Why Nuclear Bunkers Don’t Make Good Nightclubs

What do you do when you’ve invested millions in an underground bunker system, only to have the Cold War fizzle out without even a sniff of nuclear attack? Open a museum and offer guided tours to the public? Eventually, yes. But only after trying (unsuccessfully) to get the nation drunk enough to forget that the whole thing ever happened.

I’ll be honest – when our tour guide told us that the bunker we were standing in had been a nightclub for many years, I thought he was joking. When he told us that it had to be shut down because it was too airtight (perfect for surviving a nuclear crises – less than ideal for a bar full of sweating bodies, cigarettes and illicit marijuana fumes), I definitely thought he was joking.

I’m not sure why it really closed (and neither is Google, apparently), but the guys at the Nuclear Bunker Tour aren’t just pulling your leg – it really did exist.

And I, for one, am sorry to have missed it. I guess I’ll just hang on another two or three decades – maybe it’ll be yoga in front of Brexit placards next.